Over...whelmed.

Sigh.  Ok, so I mostly pride myself on being positive, optimistic, yaddah, yaddah, yaddah... Well, today I just can't.  Everyone deserves a break from anything once in a while, right?  Hah.  And really, I just need to get this out to hopefully ease my increasing anxiety. 

So anyway... school has begun and I'm still working full time.  The MSW program is part-time for now and then it'll kick into full time in January 2013.  For just two classes, seriously, tons of reading assignments, papers, etc.  The work environment is as crazy as heck.  The supervisors/organization are constantly putting more and more on us while not allowing overtime, more restrictions, etc.  How is that good for the organization in the long run?  So we're seeing lots of turn over, lots of switching positions, lots of change and slow adaptation, less passion.  It's gotten to the point where I just dread going to work because there's never enough time, always a fear of being "in trouble" for one thing or another due to some new thing that was sprung on us.  Ugh.  I just need to budget my time better, I guess?  Can I just eliminate work?  I think financially, we could... but I like contributing at least a little to our income... personally, it gives me a sense of independence and I like that.  I know I'll get through this with God's help.  This just feels like one of the most stressful times of my life.  Everyday, I'm tired.  Everyday, my stomach is in knots.  Everyday, my head feels like it's going to explode.  Everyday, I'm feeling bad about myself, feeling inadequate and that I can't do anything right.  I don't like this.  So something needs to change... or... how much longer can I live like this? 

I need to be a better advocate for myself.